Two very elderly friends, Max and Gus, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.
One day Gus didn't show up. Max didn't think much about it, figured maybe he had a cold or some such. But after Gus hadn't shown up for a week or so Max really got worried.
The only time they spent together was at the park, and Max couldn't remember where Gus said he lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him. A month passed and Max figured old Gus had gone to his heavenly reward, but one day Max approached the park and, lo and behold, there sat Gus!
Max was very excited and happy to see him and told him so! Then he said, "For crying out loud Gus, what happened to you???"
"I have been in jail," Gus replied.
"Jail?" cried Max, "What in the world for?"
"Well," Gus said, "You know Sue, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where we sometimes get coffee?"
"Yeah" said Max, "I remember her. What about her?"
"Well, one day last month she got mad at me and to get even, she charged me with rape. I was so proud of what everyone would think an old goat like me could still do, that when I got into court,
I pled 'Guilty'." "The judge took a good look at me and gave me 30 days for perjury."
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