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Saturday, January 16, 2010

EFFECTIVE WAYS TO STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Hi! everyone,


As the world is becoming more and more integrated, no man can live on his own. Therefore, integration and staying well connected become crucial and important in our lives. To be successful, you need to maintain good and lasting relationship with others. You can only grow further through this healthy relationship

1. Respecting each other is an absolutely fundamental pillar in establishing good relationship. This means that we have to accept who they are; caring and loving them for their uniqueness and differences. However, many people expect others to conform in ways they deem appropriate. This is more inclined to slavery than love! Bear in mind that others are not neither your private property, nor your slave. Needless to say, it is not conducive for you to have a happy relationship when you restrict their freedom by treating them in the above manner. Most human beings may want to grow in ways, not to your liking or your comfort,  but preventing their growth will stifle both you and them. Instead of restricting others' freedom, it is far better to encourage them to grow and become the persons they want to be. Indeed, the only way that can assure a person can  flourish is through true love.

2. None of us is perfect. Therefore to have successful relationships with others, we need to tolerate each other's imperfectness. Understanding others will help us to see things from their perspective, and not from ours. Through this, we will not only become wiser, but  will also reduce conflicts through better understanding of each other. This means tolerance will serve to maintain harmony and strengthen relationship. We must be aware that every one has his own belief, culture, liking and preferences. Therefore you need more than love to build a long lasting relationship. Without tolerance and compromise, there will be no true relationship. Extra care is required especially in the multi-racial environment. True harmony will not be achieve if any particular race remains more superior than the others because it acts against the profound human principle of equality. Good and sound relation will not take place if  there is no true acceptance of each other and no true equality in that sense. These will create hatred due to lack of trust among them.

3. Argument is the worst way to spoil relationship, if left unchecked, because the tendency is for the person is to win and to be right. So, watch out for this DEADLY trait. Argumentative people have a great tendency to argue until they "win" about everything and anything. They will not listen and consider others' viewpoints. This is because they are rarely compromise. You must bear in mind that any criticism, however fair and justified will be met with opposition. Therefore, it is wise to not indulge in silly futile arguments. Remember that winning arguments is not the objective, but what is more important is to establish truly good and lasting relationship.

4. Listening and learning are required. Relation is build through understanding  each other. As such, you need to listen and learn from others so as to avoid conflict. This serve as a double edge sword that can cut both sides. To ensure lasting and healthy relations, we cannot lack these skills. Without these, there is no true understanding.  We need to polish our listening and learning skill for us to grow beyond our personal capabilities.

5. Open minded. A fundamental prerequisite for learning is an open mind. No one can learn without doing so. The undeniable truth is that who we are is what we believe in. The things we believe control our lives. We pass judgment based on our beliefs and we perceive things from our own belief windows. How can we see others' perspectives if we are restricted by our own beliefs?  To accept change and new idea, we need to change our core belief that allow us to open our heart to listen to the new idea. Without doing so, there is no way we can acquire new ideas because our belief has rejected them in the first place prior to listening.

I challenge you to give the above serious thought and I hope that the proven recipes will not only assist you in strengthening your relationship with others, but also ensure that you enjoy long lasting happiness and a deeper loving bond.

Please do voice out your thoughts via comments so as we can enrich our discussion. Thank you in advance for your kind participation.

Wish you a success,

James Oh

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

SUCCESS ACCELERATION : HOW TO

Hi! everyone,



Before we discuss three main core elements in success acceleration process, we must first fulfill the requirement of willing to CHANGE. These main core elements are basically Basic fundamental, Right Strategies and Technique/Know how. In short, if a person know precisely what he is doing ( Basic fundamental), fully aware what he needs to do ( Right Strategies) and adapt his action accordingly (Right technique), then he is able to expedite his achievement.

I) Basic fundamental comprises of the following:-

a. Free from limiting beliefs
He must not be a captive of his limiting beliefs. To overcome this, he need to have an open mind and be willing to listen to new ideas so that existing limiting beliefs can be kept in check constantly. By doing so, he will be able to identify these limiting beliefs one by one and replace them with unlimited beliefs. Eventually he will set himself entirely free from these limiting beliefs. Hence, he will accelerate his success.

b. Skill
Those who lack overall wellness management skill will have difficulty in maintaining the discipline that produce continued success. For sustaining and continuous growth in success, he needs to manage all his time and resources effectively and efficiently by optimizing the overall wellness of his life be it spiritual, educational, financial, health, family and social. No matter how difficult his situation might be, he always give himself time to change. He always have hope so long as he is breathing.

c. Winning formula
To achieve anything, you need to have the necessary ingredients to achieve it. Similarly to success. Confidence, persistence and enthusiasm are key ingredients for this winning formula, which will form the driving force towards success. They serve as fertile soil which provide nourishment and yield crops.
All the above three are integrated and function as one so as to ensure optimal growth at all times. These three  continuously interact with each other and sharpen each other persistently so as to produce the highest possible result.

II) Right Strategies basically comprises of :-

a. Action
Here, action refers to continuous acts, which must be consistent with plans, objectives and beliefs. Every team member is well aware of them and constantly takes his best action working towards ultimate goals. As the foundation is well laid in each and every member's heart and mind, the entire team will function like one body well connected with the mind. As you are well aware that a well thought plan for success requires a tremendous amount of mental focus and emotional energy before action can be implemented.

b. Maximising effectiveness
To accelerate success, you need to constantly manage your time and resources effectively so as to reap the maximum outputs at all times. An opened mind, willingness to learn and listening skills are basic ingredients to obtaining maximum outputs. Hence,  continuous improvement in every possible aspect is always made possible.

c.Vision, Plan, Goal setting
Significant accomplishments always begin with a vision or dream. Plan and goal setting will be an effective tool for you to manage your resources towards your ultimate goal. To achieve accelerated success, you need to ensure that productivity and speed are the end results.


III) Technique/ know how

a. Leverage
No one has all the abilities, talents and competence in every aspect. No one is perfect either. As such, to accelerate success we need to use the strengths from every team member to function as a body. The body should be controlled by one brain to organise, co-ordinate and execute each plan accordingly to reap its best performance. Using the concept of leverage, we not only achieve more, but also achieve it  much faster. A very good illustration is comparing the pipeline builder and the bucket carrier. The pipeline builder only carries out the task once, but enjoy the fruit for a much longer period than the latter who has water only after the return trip from the well. You see the difference now.

b. Learning from the real experts
Learn to follow and benchmark successful people. You need to constantly observe and study from those who has made it. Through closely monitoring, you will also not only monitor your progress, but also raise your standards as you progress. You will benefit in two ways, - i) you will avoid disappointment over unrealistic targets, and ii) you will raise your standard to propel yourself in a better position. No doubt, you can't use  similar ways to achieve any breakthrough results, however you will have an unshakeable foundation to grow further. With such insight, you will give yourself a much better chance to reap more outstanding results.

c. Good relationship
By now, you should able to see that to stay well connected with others, you need to establish good relationship with others. To become successful, you need to be skillful in convincing and persuading other people to take your desired action on your behalf as a team. You need to gain self respect from others so as to ensure you are trusted and likeable person. Your daily action must be reflected consistently to what you preach. It is vitally important so that they are fully convicted and convinced.

d. Practise, practise and practise
Nothing can beat procrastination in causing failure. You must be fully aware that everything has to be just right or even perfect before one can begin the fundamental concept. Procrastination creates  a false belief that it can save one from failure. The truth is that it will guarantee failure. As such, practise, practise and practise is the answer. Through practise, you can perfect any skill or trade. It is interesting to note that parallel progress allows you to accomplish more things faster, rather than simply completing each task separately with chronological steps. As such, you need to go for parallel progress if you want to accelerate success.

I hope I have given you an insight of those key principles that can assist you to expedite your success. I am throwing the ball to your court and now it is up to you whether to accept the necessary changes. It is not too late to change and I am more than happy to work hand in hand with you to accomplish our mutual objectives. To me, each of us has his own strength and to accelerate our goals, we need to use our individual's strength to complement our individual's weakness so that we can achieve more.

As usual, please forward your ideas, experience, wisdom and thought through comments so as we can continue to learn from each other. Thank you in advance for your kind participation.

Thank you for your precious time and wish you success.

Get ready for an exciting life.


James Oh